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Writing a graduate application essay is an exciting opportunity to share your journey and show the admissions committee who you are beyond your grades and test scores. It’s your chance to present your personal story, showcase your academic achievements, and highlight the experiences that shaped your academic goals and future goals. In this guide, we’ll break down how to refine an essay using a sample graduate application essay for Educational Leadership.
A strong essay is a critical step in the application process to help you stand out to admissions and demonstrate how your unique experiences and aspirations align with the program’s values. Let’s take a closer look at a sample essay to identify what works, what doesn’t, and how to improve.
Table of Contents:
Leadership Statement of Purpose Essay Sample
Note: This essay appears unedited for instructional purposes. Essays edited by experienced graduate application essay editors are dramatically improved.
“My purpose for seeking a Doctorate Degree in Educational Leadership is to expand my knowledge of theory and research methods as it pertains to education. I especially want to fine-tune my research skills as I feel that the importance of gaining research skills is imperative to becoming a lifelong learner and developing intellectual self-actualization as I prepare myself for a career in Education. I realize the importance of gaining credibility among my future colleagues and people that I will be serving in the field.
My view of Education is that of a reformist. I have a particular interest in the improvement of homeless individuals, single mothers and women of color. Because of my own experience with both homelessness and single motherhood, I know the feeling of helplessness as you are sinking deeper and deeper in desperation that you feel that you will never recover from it. I have seen how generations of these people have become prisoners by being illiterate and /or insufficiently educated around our city with little or no hope of getting free from their bondage. Although I have struggled hard to get myself out of this situation I refuse to forget.
I have strove to make a difference wherever I can. As volunteer at Christian Assistance Ministry I witnessed the overworked conditions that the social workers and volunteers faced. Worn from these conditions these dedicated workers had no respite from their daily work of feeding, clothing and providing funds for the homeless and families who have found themselves in a desperate situation. Although I had many job responsibilities at Christian Assistance Ministry the most common was that of interviewer where I assessed the clients situation and offered help either monetary or that of food and clothing. I soon found that intake and interview forms as well as information that was distributed to the patrons. I took it upon myself after approval from the Director to redo and modernize these forms and lists. Also I had initiated lists of other agencies that would assist clients find additional help that they needed in the Greater Houston Area. One of theses lists that I have generated has been used by City Public Service to refer customers that are in need of financial assistance to pay their utility bills. I had contacted each of the agencies personally to get up to date hours, addresses and contact names and numbers before adding them to the list. Many patrons of Christian Assistance Ministry were included in my project as I compiled lists of job hotlines, shelters and affordable housing options. This inclusion also gave many of the patrons a sense of community collaboration, as I would discuss information with them.
In my present job at SeaNet I felt that it was necessary to know what our clients, Small businesses Development Center and Small business administration Counselors felt about the services we were providing them since in the job we do we don’t have personal contact with them. With my directors approval I sent out surveys asking various questions about the service we provide and got an overwhelming response. This information was used in a quarterly report that is submitted to our funding agency in Washington DC. At SeaNet I am known as an individual that prides herself in thorough research techniques. I am often being asked to do research for special projects that are beyond our usual information requests. Most recently I have done research on the availability of renewable energy sources in South Texas. This research was for a consortium of various Universities in Texas, The Economic Development Center, Solar Energy and Brooks Air Force Base investigating who are examining the feasibility using various energy sources.
I am also an advocate of 21st Century Learning Centers that would provide a safe refuge for the millions of latch-key children in this country that go home to an empty house on any given school day. Along with that thought are full service schools that would provide many of the health and social services so desperately needed in many school districts. I have and continue to research community programs that are available to school children and their families. I recently collaborated with three such agencies (Upward Bound, Peace Center, and Davis….) in Houston to present to my fellow classmates the importance and impact community collaboration makes on our schools in our city. I also provided information in the form of brochures and handouts about other such organizations that could assist in the needs of their own schools. I feel that it is imperative that every teacher, principle and administrative staff in all schools be aware of these resources in our community. After the presentation of these research topics for educational leadership many of my classmates who are teachers and administrators contacted several of the organizations that I had introduced them to in that hour presentation and have started programs within their schools.
Although I have not yet formally been employed in the educational work environment I have been a mentor for many students attending Davis Middle School as well as a tutor for several home-schooled children. During the years of my own children attending school, I was very involved in their schools both private and public and took on many organizational and leadership roles. I served on many boards and was very active in assisting instructors and administrators in the schools my children attended. Because of these 15 years of experience, I am very familiar with the diverse educational system in Houston.
I have helped develop leadership in others by serving as an example of how far you can go in education with dedication and hard work. By being a student I have been example to others who didn’t feel they could juggle school with work and raising a family. I have a very hard working and decisive character that has earned me a 4.0 GPA. I have never been one to do anything halfway but instead show the dedication and integrity it takes to finish a project to its fullest.
My short-term goals include: establishing a network of scholars and future administrators, participating in a rigorous intellectual process.
My short-term goals include taking full advantage of the Doctorate program to fine-tune and learn more about research and writing skills. I want to use and improve my knowledge in quantitative research using programs such as SPSS and Microcase, in tandem with qualitative researching techniques. I want to develop a clear and concise understanding of leadership and the education profession and how the two mesh as one while enjoying the opportunity to develop a network of scholars. To experience the community and closeness that my fellow cohort mates can provide enjoy the opportunity to brainstorm and discuss pressing issues in our schools today and how we/I/they plan on changing them for tomorrow. After researching many doctorate programs in the area I feel that Texas A&M is unique in the standpoint of wanting to create a bonding collaborative experience among all the Educational Leadership Students and especially among cohort mates. I feel that the young and innovative program suits the fresh outlook on Educational Leadership that I am in search of. I have seen the department of education blossom in the last 4 years that I have been involved with it. I can appreciate the effort and future seeking work that is going on in the department, everyone has the attitude of moving forward and evolving with the times. To me this is the true example of reform, there is no lip service in this program, and it is practicing what it preaches. I know that in the classes that I have taken there is open invitation for research and suggestions for improvement solicited. Although I have no trouble working independently on projects it is reassuring that there will be others to inspire the creative juices that comes from group interaction that this program invites. I will look forward to working with professors that I have worked with before and I am anxious to meet those I have not. There is camaraderie in the Education Department that I do not feel is quite like any other at Texas A&M.
My long-term goals take what I have learned in my master’s courses in combination with the doctorate courses that will well have prepared me to enter any job in Education. I intend to prepare much of the educational leadership research topics using the foundations for a higher level of research I have established at Texas A&M and be published and make a difference in how the underprivileged will be educated. I know that the preparation for that higher plane of achievement that has been instilled in me will serve me well in any Educational or Governmental Occupation I will find myself in. Above all I will be secure in my ability to someway participate in the nation’s urgent need to educate moor efficiently and comprehensively.”
See this essay after the edit. Also, see the educational leadership goal statement examples in our blog.
Writing Tips for Crafting a Successful Application Essay
While the sample essay contains some excellent elements, like personal insights and clear objectives, there’s room for improvement. Here are some graduate essay tips to help you write a successful application essay:
1. Keep It Focused
Trying to include every detail about your life can overwhelm readers and dilute your message. Focus on the experiences that best illustrate your academic background and relevant experience. Make sure each paragraph contributes to a cohesive narrative.
2. Structure Matters
Start with an engaging introduction that sets the tone and outlines your academic goals. Use the body to explore your key strengths, academic achievements, and impactful experiences. Conclude by tying these elements to your future goals and how the program fits into your journey.
3. Highlight Your Unique Voice
Your essay should reflect your personality and passion. Share your personal story with confidence, and don’t be afraid to show emotion or enthusiasm—just keep it professional. The admissions committee wants to see the authentic you.
4. Be Specific
Vague statements like “I’m passionate about education” won’t leave a lasting impression. Instead, provide examples of projects or roles where you made a difference. For instance, discuss how your leadership in a community program impacted others.
5. Proofread for Clarity
Small errors can distract from your message. Take the time to review your essay for grammar, punctuation, and flow. If possible, have a peer or professional review it to catch any overlooked issues.
Final Thoughts
Writing a graduate school essay doesn’t have to be stressful. By focusing on your unique journey and following these tips, you can craft a compelling narrative that captures your passion, highlights your strengths, and aligns with the program’s mission. The sample essay serves as a starting point to show that every essay can be improved with care and attention.
If you plan to apply to a certain program, you must explain your connection to it and your motivation in your statement of purpose. This sample has good content but needs some improvements. However, you can use it as a template for writing your paper. Send the final version of your essay for graduate school to our statement of purpose editing service: we’ll review your paper and correct mistakes.
